My Contest Was Not Rigged

I am into conspiracy. If I were you, I’d think the contest was rigged too. I did spend some time going through the names, astounded at the representation of the country. We were totally planning on getting on a plane and making the journey somewhere far away for this. I was prepared.  I knew it would be unlikely, possible, but unlikely to stay in the state. Like I said on the video, this is real. Not fake. The video was done in one take. I made Ella practice the pouring of the names into the salad twirler from the hat box one time. Ella drew a name in the rehearsal only to pull out the one and only blank slip. Whoa.  Once again, I promise and swear on everything sacred that the contest was not rigged. I am a big believer in karma.  Congratulations to Nicholas Dellinger. Let’s party. By the way…I’m going to need a trailer with a working bathroom, a team of female massage therapists, a golf cart, an espresso machine, a chef for omelets (breakfast), some brick oven pizza (lunch), and of course surf and turf (dinner). I guess you will need a brick oven too. Also, I will need Grey Goose, Jameson, and your finest bottle of red wine preferably from the late 70’s. Please provide fresh ice, club soda, limes, and fresh squeezed orange juice. Don’t forget the cups. Solo brand only please. Red of course. Please provide a trampoline along with an ambulance and medical staff. I will also need a tuned grand piano to relax with before the set. I think that’s it. Thanks for everyone who participated. Should be interesting.